BW 096: From People Pleaser to Powerhouse: Talia's Tips for Women as a Christian Confidence Coach

widow interview May 07, 2024
 

(Transcript below)

 

Are you a people-pleaser who suffers from approval addiction?

As widows we often put ourselves last, serving others out of guilt or “I should’s”.

Talia Osborne, shares her story of how she stopped being a people-pleaser and now serves as a Christian Confidence Coach.

In this episode we talk about:

-The impact of loss on confidence and faith

-Talia’s journey from people pleaser to confidence coach

-Rebuilding confidence and trust in God

-The power of sharing and healing through stories

-Advice for rebuilding relationships and confidence

-How to connect with Talia

You can find Talia at:

IG: https://www.instagram.com/christianconfidencecoach/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@christianconfidencecoach

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/talia.osborne

Online: www.redefineyourtime.com

 

Her free gift is available here: https://j27.22a.myftpupload.com/free-booklet/

 

It’s time to break free from the cycle of people pleasing and reclaim your life and relationships. This book is a short valuable guide for Christian women who struggle with approval addiction. Through the five steps outlined in this book, you will learn how to acknowledge the problem, seek God’s guidance, identify your triggers, set healthy boundaries, and practice self-care. With the support and wisdom from your coach, Talia, you’ll be equipped to overcome people pleasing and live a more fulfilling life. Get ready to embark on a transformative journey towards self-discovery and freedom from people pleasing.

 

Talia is a Mom of 5, Wife, Author of the Devotional Journal: Trust and Act: 30 days of faith in Action. She helps women who struggle with people pleasing, a lack of boundaries, perfectionism and negative self talk (that stems from a lack of confidence). She helps them to build confidence in Christ first and then in themselves.


Hey hey, I’m Emily Tanner. I was widowed at age 37, one month shy of our 20 year wedding anniversary. Nathan and I have four beautiful children together, and my world was turned completely upside down when I lost him.

Now, I love my life again! I’m able to experience joy, achieve goals and dreams I thought I’d lost, and rediscover this next version of me. I did the work. I invested in coaching for myself. I learned what I needed to do to move forward and took the steps. I implemented the tools and strategies that I use for my clients in my coaching program.

This is for you, if:

* You want a faith-based approach to coaching

* You want to move forward after loss, and aren’t sure how

* You want to enjoy life without feeling weighed down by guilt, sadness, or regret

* You want a guide to help navigate this journey to the next version of you

* You want to rediscover who you are F

 

or 1-1 Coaching: https://www.bravewidow.com/coaching-options

For group/community: https://www.bravewidow.com/join

 

Find and take the next steps to move forward (without “moving on”).

 


Transcript

 

Welcome to The Brave Widow Show: Confidence After Loss
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[00:00:00] Emily: Welcome to the Brave Widow Show, where we help widows find hope, heal their heart, and dream again for the future. I'm your host, Emily Tanner. After losing my husband of 20 years, I didn't know how I could ever experience true joy and excitement again for the future. I eventually learned how to create a life I love, and I've made it my mission to help other widows do the same.

Join me and the Brave Widow membership community and get started today. Learn more at BraveWidow. com

 

[00:00:35] Emily: Hey, hey, and welcome to episode number 96 of the brave widow show on today's episode.


Exploring the Impact of Loss on Confidence and Faith
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[00:00:41] Emily: I speak with Talia Osborne, who is a Christian confidence coach and as widows, we lose our sense of confidence. Most of us, most of the clients that I coach and that I work with, when we lost our person, we really lost our sense of self confidence, confidence in our ability to make decisions, confidence to know what the right thing is to do.

Just confidence all around like our realm and our perception of reality is shattered when we lose our person and confidence is something that we struggle with. We also tend to struggle with our relationship with God when we've lost our person. Now, for some people, this loss really tends to bring them closer to God.

For other people, it seems to drive them away. And for others, it seems to put them in what feels like a very strange space of I know God loves me, I know he wants the best for me, and I know this really bad thing happened. How can we reconcile feelings of we live in a broken world, we know that death and separation were not part of God's original plan, we know that bad things happen, and we also know that sometimes God intervenes.

That sometimes there are miracles, but in the instance of losing our person, it doesn't seem like that was the case. And so we really can start to feel uneasy about what our relationship with God is, how we can talk and say out loud some of these things that we're thinking of. I know what I should believe and, and who God is supposed to be, and I'm really, really hurting.

So, Talia and I really discuss this topic of how, how women and people in general can rebuild their confidence in God, can restart their relationship, can approach God with honesty and vulnerability, and yet without trying to push Him away. I know you guys are really gonna enjoy this episode, so let me introduce you to Talia.


Introducing Talia Osborne: Christian Confidence Coach
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[00:03:07] Emily: Talia Osborne is a mom of five. A wife, an author of the devotional journal, Trust and Act, 30 Days of Faith and Action. She helps women who struggle with people pleasing, a lack of boundaries, perfectionism, and negative self talk that stems from a lack of confidence. She helps women build confidence in Christ first and them in the church.

And then in themselves, you can find Talia on Instagram and Tik TOK at Christian confidence coach on Facebook at Talia.Osborne dot Osborne, or at redefineyourtime.com your time. com. She also has a free gift for you, our audience and listeners. And I'm going to share more information about that and where you can find it just after the show. All right, let's dive in.

Hey, Hey, and welcome back to another episode of the brave widow show. I'm here with Talia Osborne and she has some great insights and tips to share with you today.

So Talia, thank you for joining me and welcome to the show.

[00:04:13] Talia: Thank you for having me. I'm so glad to be here. Um, it's so nice to, to connect with people with different backgrounds and just to get to, to know them and, and be able to tell our stories to each other. Right.

[00:04:26] Emily: Yeah, absolutely. And I came across Talia had commented, I think on someone's post in a different Facebook group.

And I don't even remember exactly what you said, but as soon as I saw it, I thought, Oh, I know people need to hear this. Uh, I think it was about, Helping women build confidence in God. So if you don't mind, why don't you share some of what you do with our audience and a little bit about your story.

[00:04:54] Talia: All right.


Talia's Journey: From People Pleaser to Confidence Coach
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[00:04:54] Talia: So, uh, my name is Talia Osborne, as she said. Um, I am a mom of five girls, married for 18 years. Um, and I suffered from an approval addiction. Um, and I label it as people pleasing. And so for a long time, I was one who would just go along with the crowd, right? Um, I didn't really have the confidence to go and to say what I really believed or what I really felt.

And, you know, I think that stems from a number of things in my childhood, but, um, there came a point where I remember just crying out to God because I realized that something else was on the altar of my heart, right? And so I felt a disconnect from God for a long time, even though I did all the right things.

Um, and so when he, that night, I remember being in my car crying and just saying, I don't want to do this anymore. Like, I just, I don't want to do this anymore. And. And it was like the, the flood gates opened. And I remember for the first time in years, I was able to like open my Bible and actually read it because I had such a spiritual block from being a people pleaser that I couldn't.

Couldn't connect with the word at all. You know, I could hear it on Sunday and try to apply it, but I couldn't myself, like in my quiet time, which I didn't have one, I couldn't connect with God. Um, and so that's really why. I wanted to start to help people with the same thing because once the floodgates opened for me, I was able to read my Bible.

I was able to understand the word for the first time in a long time. Um, I was able to worship freely and, and my prayers became deeper than, you know, just surface level prayers. Right. And so, um, So I decided, you know, I knew for a long time that I wanted to help women, but I just didn't know how. And so that's why I became a Christian, what I call myself a Christian competence coach, um, so that I could help other women who suffer with low confidence, because that's really where it stems from.

Um, and so it can show up in different ways. It can show up in anger. It can show up in, um, negative self talk. Um, people pleasing or, uh, approval addiction, um, and even perfectionism and not setting boundaries. And so my goal is to help women, um, discover confidence in Christ first, because I think everything we do should flow from that place that we are confident in what God said, and then we live it out.

Right. So that's kind of my background and how I got started.

[00:07:43] Emily: Oh, I love that. Thank you so much for sharing. Um, I really resonate with the approval addiction and the people pleasing. And, um, I'm actually in the middle of reading the book Boundaries, I think by Dr. Henry cloud. And, uh, it's really interesting how much guilt we place on ourselves and doing for other people.

And it's like, we take on this big obligation of, well, I should do this because. It's my mom, or I should do this because it's my boss, or You know, whoever it is, but, um, I really feel like this is such a great topic for widows because as a widow, when you lose your person, you lose a lot of confidence. Like you lose your thinking partner, that person that you could say, Hey, what, you know, what do you think about this?

What should we do over there? And your confidence just in daily life and your perception of reality is. shattered. And so one of the things that most widows really have to do is build up their confidence again and try to, to figure out how they can do that when they've lost what feels like their, um, other half.

[00:09:00] Talia: Right.

[00:09:01] Emily: I also really like what, when you call yourself a Christian confidence coach, because I know for me, my faith really was what got me through a lot of the difficult and unbelievable times. And when widows lose their spouse, sometimes that can bring them closer to God. Sometimes it drives them away.

Sometimes they just get in this weird place where it's like, I want to have a relationship with God, but everything just feels so different. And I don't even know. How I could put my trust in him again. So do you have any thoughts around, or maybe how can people even get started with, like you said, if they're, they've lost their confidence, their people pleasing and taking care of everyone else, which is very common for widows.

How do you break the cycle and even get to the point where they can open their Bible and feel good about reading it again?


Rebuilding Confidence and Trust in God
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[00:09:59] Talia: So I think one of the things that I go through with my clients, um, and even with myself, this is one of the things that I think helped me to understand who God made me. That's the first thing.

Um, because I think if we, we don't understand who God made us, then we think that there's parts of us that are a mistake or there's parts of our story that shouldn't have happened. Right. And so what I like to do is I call it, um, self awareness. Um, but basically, We go through, um, these passages in scripture.

And so we're gonna, I'm going to go through them a couple at a time, and then we're just going to talk about the deeper meaning in them. Um, and I always recommend whenever you hear scripture to go back and read it in its context, because I think that's really important too. Um, but. The first verse, um, is Jeremiah 29, 11.

And I know many of us know this verse, but it says for, I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you a hope and a future. And I know that. If you've had a loss like that, it might be hard to see the future, right? It might be hard to understand like, well, God said he had a plan.

So is this part of his plan? I would say that there's sin in the world. So sometimes the sin plays a part in, in our lives that we could not predict, right. But that God knew about it and he made a plan for it anyways. So, so that he would get the glory in the end. Um, and so. We're going to go to the next one.

Um, Psalms 139, um, 13 for my, and, um, for you, for my inmost being, you knit me together in my mother's womb. And when I think about knitting, I think about how it's a process and you have to plan it. It's not like, let's just throw paint on the wall and see what happens. Right. It's. It's okay. This color has to go here to form this part of my project.

And this part has to go here and I have to have so many stitches. And so when God formed us, he wasn't, he didn't just do it and just say, okay, this looks good, let's just see what happens. He planned us out. So I thought about it as every, you know, dimple in my butt cheek, every wrinkle on my face, every blemish of my skin, the color of my skin, my hair, all of it.

God knew that it was going to turn out. I was going to turn out how I am right now. Right. And so while some of it may have been my own fault, maybe I eat too much and you know, I'm a little heavier than I want to be, but God knew that I would be this way. Right. And he, but he made a plan for that part of me anyways.

And so he didn't make a mistake. And then you go into, um, Jeremiah one, um, one five, which says before I formed you in your womb, I knew you before you were born. I set you apart. And so he knew the struggles that we would have. He knew how we would react to those. But the thing about us is that we have to understand that we have our strengths and our weaknesses, right?

And so. When you look at your strengths, if you look at them alone, you become prideful and big headed and conceited, right? But if you look at just your, what you consider your weaknesses, then you can become depressed and sad and, um, think you're not good enough for anything. It's the two things married together with God being the stitching that allows us to see the perfect picture of who we are, because as his word says, um, his power is made perfect in our weakness.

And so when you look at both of those, you get a beautiful picture of who you are rather than being conceited or being, um, thinking of yourself lowly. Right. So when we work together, um, and, and put all this together, we have to understand that. God has a plan. And I know it's so cliche to say, because we just throw it around.

Right. And when something awful happens, people say, Oh, well, God has a plan. And you're like, shut up. Like, I don't want to hear that right now. Right. Because you're in, you're in a very tough situation, but the truth is he did have a plan. He does have a plan. And so it is for every situation that we've ever been in.

God made a plan for it. And I, I may have not lost my husband, but I did have a miscarriage. And so, you know, and it's hard because you want to ask why, But that's not necessarily the way to move forward, because why doesn't give you, um, it doesn't fix anything, right? But what does fix something is us going deeper with God. Give him your anger. If you're angry, give it to him. He can handle it. Look at Job. Job was mad. He lost everything. He lost everything.

And so God can handle your anger. So don't be afraid to tell him how you really feel, but then sit with him and listen. Amen. You know, and I think part of why it's so hard for us, even when we're not grieving to connect with God is that we are so distracted. And we, we can't hear God. And I just think about the Israelites, how they, they got to see God in the clouds and then he was on the mountaintop and he spoke to them and, and even some people got to walk with him.

And, and I think that when you take the time to really get to know who God is, studying the word, praying, giving him worship, um, of all kinds, I think that You're able to start to understand who he is, and that, um, just because it happened doesn't mean that that was his plan in the beginning. Like, I don't think he ever planned for, you know, me to have a miscarriage.

I think that it's just part of being in this, in this world, right? But he can use He can use that part of my story to benefit someone else. And, and so it's important for all of us, whatever season we're in, whatever we're going through to really just, go deeper with God when you feel tempted to pull away, that's really the time you have to, you have to say, no, I'm not going anywhere.

God, you got to give me something right. And the more you spend time in his word, the more confidence you're going to have in who he says he is, because I was a, you know, Christian Christian only on Sunday kind of person, right? I only read my Bible on Sunday and that didn't get me very far because I can only, um, when I need, when I had troubles, I can only go back to what I was told and not what I actually knew in my heart.

So when you study the word for yourself, um, you're able to see, um, what, who God actually is, not just what people tell you he is. So I don't know if that's helpful.

[00:17:12] Emily: Yes. Thank you. It's so hard being in this place where, You're trying to reconcile between, we live in a world that's broken, death really wasn't part of the original plan, um, death and separation were not, and sometimes in life bad things just happen.

Period. Yeah. And it doesn't mean that God can't make something beautiful out of it. I think sometimes people just really struggle with, okay, sometimes bad things happen, but sometimes God does intervene and provide a miracle, or sometimes You know, maybe this, it wasn't part of the plan for my husband to die originally, but now I can do something with that and create a purpose and helping other people that are going through that pain.

And so I think what you said was so spot on about just Sharing with God how you're feeling and, and one of the things that I even help teach my clients is, you know, if you're frustrated or angry, or you don't understand, you can say all of that to God, like, God, I don't hate you, but I really don't understand this.

I don't like it. I Don't know why I had to, lose my husband and other people don't have to that have been in the same situation. Like, why me? Why this? I don't get it. But I trust that your promises and your word is true that you're going to be by my side and you're going to help me, get through this.

And that's just, that's a really difficult, complexity of emotions to work through.

[00:18:56] Talia: Yeah, I, it's that part of us that we, we try to hide a lot of times, especially I think as women, like we feel like we have to be strong all the time. And so even in our prayers, we might not really pray what we feel.

And I think, God is, he's, he's your partner. He's always been your partner, right? He's, he always meant for us to walk side by side with him. And, and I believe that he always meant for him to carry the burden of anything that should come up rather than us try to try to shoulder it alone. And so.

, I think that part of building that confidence is realizing that God will provide for you everything that you need. So it might come in the form of knowledge, right? So there might be many things that as a married woman, you didn't do because you had your spouse. But now that your spouse is gone, you may have to pick, pick up that part and you may not know how.

So God might provide the knowledge for that, right? He also might provide other people to help you in whatever situation where you're feeling like you, you can't do it, or you are unable to, um, to take care of whatever situation. And so, um, and then he might, he might also do a straight up miracle, you know?

And, and so we have to trust God. I mean, that's the hardest part. I think it's maybe just that trust part, but it's also the most important part. Because that is where everything that we do flows from. Who are you trusting? Are you trusting yourself or are you trusting God? Because when we lean on trust for ourselves, um, I think we find a lot of times that we're lacking, which again affects our confidence.

But when you lean on God and you put your trust in him, um, I think that we can discover that he is faithful and he will show up for you and he is there with you even in the most painful times.

[00:20:56] Emily: Yeah, that's so beautiful.


The Power of Sharing and Healing Through Stories
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[00:20:58] Emily: And what are some of the transformations that you've seen people make or maybe that you've had where, you know, I'm sure it's not flip a switch and 100 percent now you're confident and you've got all this trust.

So as you start to take even baby steps, you know, in that direction, how does that Truly affect people. How does that help them change or what does that do for them?

[00:21:24] Talia: Um, so one of the things that it can do for you, so especially if. Say you're a parent, right? And you've always had someone to bounce ideas off of.

Um, and now it's just you, I think that when you gain confidence, you're able to make decisions that you might not have made before you're able to trust your decisions, because I know for me, um, when I was in the middle of lacking confidence, I never made decisions. I was always like, oh, you can decide. No, no, it's up to you.

I don't really care. I probably did care, but I didn't have the confidence to say so. And so it, it opens all the doors. So, um, so now I am a lot more opinionated, um, and not saying that I'm rude or anything like that, but I'm able to say what I believe to be true without worrying about what other people think.

And, um, That can be hard even, you know, with parenting, right? We, we don't want to be too harsh. We don't want to be too soft. We, we were concerned with all these things, but sometimes you just have to make the best decision in that moment and then let God make it right. Right. You can't, you can't always get it right.

And that's again, part of confidence, knowing that it's not always going to be perfect. Um, again, for, um, for your confidence, I've seen people go from, The like hunched over not, not making eye contact, um, unable to have real conversations because they , felt so unconfident.

Sorry, I can't get the words out. Um, but once you are able to break the mold of that. You can stand up tall, hold your head high. You can dress how you want to dress. Like I, I always wanted to have red hair and now look at me. It looks so great. Thank you. Um, but you know, it's, there's so many things that changed, even the way you speak to people, um, setting up boundaries for yourself.

Understanding that you don't have to say yes to everyone all the time. And that's a really hard one to break because you're so used to it. It's so easy. It's comfortable and you don't have to worry about conflict. But once you gain the confidence to say, no, I really don't want to do that. Or no, I don't think you should do that.

Um, I think that it, it helps you, but it not only helps other people. And so, um, There's so many ways that it helps you. Like once you decide, okay, I'm, I'm done with the old me. I'm done sitting back. I'm done being quiet. Um, and then the, the other thing is just realizing how beautiful you are, like, and you are beautiful.

If no one's told you today, you're so beautiful. Um, but I think being able to say that to yourself is also important because When we don't think we're beautiful, we hide and people need to see us and they need to hear our message. And I think that's probably one of the biggest reasons why I'm so, um, passionate about people trusting God and building their confidence because we all have a story to tell.

And it's not for us to just hold to ourselves. Other people get free when we tell our stories.

[00:25:00] Emily: Yes, when we don't think we're beautiful, we hide and when we tell our stories, people get free. They can become free. Yeah. That's so true. And it's hard, right? Like it's hard when you're used to not having good boundaries or feeling like.

Oh, I should go to this family event because I that's the expectation like we always go to this family event or, I should let the them always pick where we eat out at a restaurant or whatever, because I don't I don't want to cause any conflict. I don't want to cause any ripples. You know what?

Would you say to the person that's sitting there listening and they're like, this sounds really good, but if I were to be opinionated, man, this person in my family, they would hate that. Or, they just dream up these worst case scenarios that may or may not happen. What advice or encouragement would you give to that person?

[00:26:01] Talia: First, I gotta say, like dreaming up things that would, would or would not happen is like, Where I used to live, I would play out all the scenarios like they might say this. And what if they say that? And okay. So, um, one thing you have to understand is everybody's entitled to their own feelings, but it doesn't change the truth.

So the truth could be that you really don't like sushi and they always want to go eat sushi, right? So if you tell, sometimes you have to ask yourself, what is the worst possible thing that could happen? Well, the worst possible thing is that they can never ever speak to me again, but that would be really silly, right?

Over sushi. But it could be something a little more serious and you just have to consider if you're honest with the person, And they reject you because of your honesty. What does that say about your relationship? And that's a hard thing to think about because obviously you, if, especially if they're in your family, you love them and you want to have a relationship with them.

But sometimes the problem is not with you. It's with them. And so you speaking up or speaking the truth should, it shouldn't stop you. Like you should be able to say the truth. And let them react how they're going to react. But just make sure, especially if you're a Christian, that when you react to them reacting to you, that you're doing it in love and kindness.

Um, I have been a lot more bold with my Facebook posts lately and, you know, I've had people come at me and, and so, I've been able to respond to them in love and with respect because I love and respect them. And just because they're angry and their reaction to me is not kind doesn't mean I have to return the favor.

And so that again comes with the confidence of knowing who God made me. He didn't make me so that I could be ugly to someone and possibly turn them away from God rather than me, um, trying to make peace, even though I know they may not be in the peacemaking mood.

[00:28:03] Emily: That's such a great point is.

Number one, it says more about how the other person and how they react than it says about you. Two, like what kind of relationship is that? Or maybe shouldn't be as close as it has been in the past when you're having those interactions and they respond really poorly. And then Three, just making sure as you react to their response, that you're reacting in love and kindness in a biblical way and people, we all know Jesus was not a people pleaser.

Yes. He said some pretty controversial things at the time. And given how most people believed, so, but he spoke boldly and he spoke in truth. And, you know, as you mentioned, Talia, sometimes people don't like the truth and especially in today's culture, we get so offended so easily that people start to get nervous about what they say, can say, or can't say, or, not offending a certain person.

And so there's a way to do that while also being true to yourself and. Protecting who you are.

[00:29:16] Talia: And that's something I had to learn.


Finding Your Path: Advice for Rebuilding Relationships and Confidence
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[00:29:17] Talia: Like it's not easy, but like, you know, you, you asked about, um, how you can go about rebuilding your relationship with God. And so part of that, , part of me understanding who I was and how to handle myself in those situations goes back to really diving into the word.

And so, , I just want to touch on what I did when I was first, um, coming back to being able to read the Bible. And, and I've, I started small, like that, that's one recommendation I can give is start small. The second recommendation is you don't have to do it the way everyone else does it. Cause I think that we get stuck in these Christian traditions and they end up holding us back from actually connecting with God.

And so. Um, I've tried, reading the Bible in a year. I could not do it like I could read it, but I didn't understand anything. I wasn't remembering anything. And so, um, when I first started reading scripture again, I started with the Bible app. So because they give you a scripture every day, and so you can literally take that scripture and go read it in context, listen to the little video they give you.

And that can be your, your start to your day, or that can be the end of your night. Um, Um, but it's just, it's quick. It's easy. Usually it's a short read, so you don't have to commit a whole lot of time if you're not used to that yet, but then build on that from there. Um, maybe then you're going to throw in, maybe I'm going to pray for five minutes and do that.

And then now I'm going to add a worship song and do all those things. Right. And then from there, my desire to read the word, because I was actually understanding it. Um. My desire to read the word just grew. And so, you know, now I'm at the point where I read a very small, I am trying to read the Bible all the way through for the first time.

And so I'm reading like very small clippets of scripture at night. Um, just so that I can, you know, Really think about it, understand it, connect with it. Um, and then in the mornings I am spending, you know, it depends. It's not always exact, but I'm spending time in the word, reading, praying, worshiping, and, and it has changed so much for me because my understanding of who God is, is so much different.

Because I'm, and now I'm able to, to trust them even more with even more things in my life. So I fully recommend if you're having a really hard time, you know, you can start with prayer. You can start with the Bible app. You can, um, start attending a Bible study, whatever it is that helps you to get started, do that, but also don't feel locked into a certain thing.

There's been times where I have, um, I've just spent my entire time worshiping and I ended up dancing and doing all these things. And, you know, a lot of people maybe wouldn't do that and that's okay. But that's what, that's what I felt in the moment. So I think it's really important that you definitely start somewhere, but also start small and, and then just commit.

[00:32:16] Emily: That's a great way to phrase it and something a lot of widows will resonate with because as they're rebuilding confidence, as they're figuring out this new life, as they're even figuring out who they are now, they Have to take small steps. They have to do things, slowly, but surely.

And, um, so that's really, really helpful for them. So Talia, who would you say, um, if someone wants to work with you, like who's your ideal client, who's the type of person that you enjoy working with or the types of things that you enjoy, um, on working with your clients on.

[00:32:52] Talia: Um, so, so my ideal client is. I mean, Christian women,, moms.

And wives, because. I am a mom and I am a wife and I can understand those struggles very well. Um, so I, I would say that the things that we work with are just struggles with being a mom are making sure that you're mothering right, right? Like that you're doing the things that you feel are right.

And I think a lot of times we struggle because again, we don't want to be too hard. We don't want to be too soft. Um, we don't want to ruin everything or we want them to be our best friend. And we don't necessarily have the confidence to stand up and say, okay, child of mine, we're not doing that. You know?

Um, and then with your spouse, you know, it's, it's being able to tell them the truth. Right? Because sometimes we're afraid that maybe they won't love us anymore. Maybe they will judge us. Um, but the truth is again, the relationship is important, but your honesty to them really helps them to understand who you are.

And they're going to love you no matter what. And that's some of the work that we can do, um, as, as we go into different sessions, but, um, I just really love my favorite part of being a coach is to see someone go from A to Z. Making that full transition and, and just changing their lives. Like there's nothing better than that for me.

[00:34:28] Emily: I love it. Okay.


Connecting with Talia Osborne and Closing Thoughts
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[00:34:30] Emily: So where can people like, what's the best way that people can find you? If they want to learn more, they want to connect with you or work with you. Where should they go?

[00:34:39] Talia: So you can go to my website, which is redefineyourtime. com. Um, I have resources on there, a free book that you can get for people pleasers.

Um, I also have my devotional and journal I released, um, designed to help us. gain trust in God. Um, and then I'm also on Facebook. I'm all over Facebook. Uh, just look for my red hair and Talia Osborne and, um, feel free to PM me, DM me. I'm there to connect.

[00:35:11] Emily: Awesome. Thank you so much. And, for those of you that are listening and driving or mowing the lawn or doing other things, we'll put all of the links in the show notes.

So you'll have access to those there. Talia, thank you so much for sharing this information and your story and,, being able to help our widows out there grow confidence.

[00:35:33] Talia: Thank you so much for having me. I hope this was helpful for you guys. Um, and I really appreciate the work that you're doing, Emily. I think it's great that you're able to take where you were and, and just to use it to benefit other people.

That's really what we should all be doing. So thank you.

[00:35:49] Emily: Okay, guys, I hope you enjoyed that conversation with Talia. I do want to mention a free gift that she has for you. So let me read you the intro of her free booklet. It's time to break free from the cycle of people pleasing and reclaim your life and relationships. This book is a short valuable guide for Christian women who struggle with approval addiction.

Through the five steps outlined in this book, you will learn how to acknowledge the problem, seek God's guidance, identify your triggers, set healthy boundaries, and practice self care. With the support and wisdom from your coach, Talia, you'll be equipped to overcome people pleasing and live a more fulfilling life.

Get ready to embark on a transformative journey towards self discovery and freedom from people pleasing. And I will have the link to this free gift for you in the show notes

Are you a widow who feels disconnected? Do you feel like you're stuck or even going backwards in your grief? Widowhood can be lonely and isolating, but it doesn't have to be. Join us in the Brave Widow membership community and connect. We teach widows how to find hope, heal their heart, and dream again for the future.

Find your purpose and create a life you love today. Go to bravewidow. com to get started.

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